It's Really Official!

For most, getting their marriage license is "the step" that makes them realize that they are truly getting married, that the big party is really going to happen. For me, and likely for others of my faith, there is a different event that brings about those feelings. After picking up my marriage license the government will recognize my marriage, but I couldn't set foot inside of the temple to actually get married until I completed a personal worthiness interview with my local church leader, and then an area church leader, at which time they grant and sign a temple recommend. Temple recommends are essential to entering the temple, I in no way could have been married inside of the temple without one. I never intended to be married anywhere else so this was an essential step for me :)

This is actually the Dallas, Texas temple. Isn't it beautiful?
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Tonight, I received my temple recommend. For those who are not a member of my faith, it might be hard to understand the significance of this event. although I am sure there are other belief systems which involve moments that evoke similar feelings. I have been singing of, reading about, and anticipating going to the temple since I was old enough to understand what it meant. It is undoubtedly the most important step I will ever take in my lifetime spiritual journey.

Tonight I feel happy and blessed. In 11 short days I will be marrying my sweetheart for forever.

At what moment was it official for you?

Belly Band Ripping

I knew the belly bands on my invites had to have a button. I didn't know what they would be made of, but the button was essential. We thought about sewing the wrap out of fabric. Did I want to do this 275 times? Fabric gone. We thought about creating dangling strings of buttons. Did I want to do this 275 times? Hanging buttons gone.

Mamacado comes home from Paper Zone with some crazy textured paper. The Avocado belly bands are born.

These sheets are huge. I was able to make 33 12"X2" bands. I tried cutting them, but as you can see, the edges have a beautiful frayed effect. I wanted all of the edges to look like this.

As with all of the That Bride DIY projects, I thought of a solution in my head, and just charged right in. I can get a little impatient sometimes, so once I come up with a way I think something can be done, I will usually charge through without stopping until it happens.

I decided I would rip the paper when wet, with the hope it would have the frayed edges I wanted it to have. I used the vinegar dropper that my mom uses when she makes salad dressing to put the water down.

I put the first strip of water down, and it looked pretty good. I was going to be able to rip that just fine.

I started to do more strips and realized that the plan wasn't working quite as well as I thought. The paper was so thin, and the water was coming out of the eyedropper so fast, that the whole sheet was basically soaked after a few stripes.

Like I said, I don't like to stop a project once I start, so I just kept going. I did about half of the huge sheet before I had a new idea. I would fold the paper over on top of itself in 2 inch sections and help disperse the water a little bit more evenly.

I used the dropper to wet the edges to make sure they would rip easily.

I then unfolded each 2" section one at a time and ripped it carefully off. Or sometimes not so carefully. I got a little impatient after a while. Sorry to those guests that got those strips!

I laid all 275 strips out and let they dry overnight. Once all of the booklets were assembled I took the belly bands, wrapped them around the books to know where to glue, and used super glue to apply the button.

How did you create your belly bands?

How to Cut Your Own First Dance Song

Ask and ye shall receive my friends. It's DIY week for me, and I couldn't be more excited to share the following projects with you. I wish I had 5, because that would a be a complete work week of projects, and it's just a nice number, but I only have 4. And I am busy, so I might not even get them all posted this week. But they are going to be good ones. Well obviously I think they are, or I wouldn't be posting them.

Let's begin with my tutorial on how to cut your own first dance. Mr. Avocado and I will be dancing to "Meet me By The Water" by Rachel Yamagata, but it has this 50 second intro we would have to wait through. Plus we don't really feel like foxtrotting around for 4 whole minutes.

Before you begin, you will need to download the program Goldwave, found here. It's free for limited use (like cutting your first dance song!) and uninstalls cleanly.

Your song needs to be in mp3 format. If it is in a protected format, burn it to CD (choose the "audio CD" option using itunes) and then reimport the song back onto your computer. Now you have your previously protected unusable song in mp3 format.

Open up the Goldwave program, and go to file open, browse through your computer files to find the mp3 version of your song.

Your song will open up and look somewhat like this. The waves can look intimidating at first, but you just have to remember that whenever the sound is louder, the waves are larger. All of those really small waves at the beginning are the 50 second long intro I want to cut out.

On the far left and right sides there are blue bars. I clicked on the left side, held the mouse button down, and dragged the blue band over to the right so that everything I wanted to keep would be highlighted.

I then went up to the toolbar and clicked on the trim button (the yellow arrows are pointing to it). This will eliminate everything that isn't inside of the blue bars and highlighted.

Now the beginning was starting really abruptly and I needed to have it fade in. I grabbed the bar on the right side and dragged it over until it highlighted the area I wanted to fade in. I selected fade in on the toolbar, and presto, I had some beautiful fade in action.

After all of this work, I wanted the song to be even shorter, so I decided to take out all of her singing in the beginning. I dragged the blue bars from the left and right side to highlight the area I wanted to eliminate and hit the "trim" button again.

This left me with an awkward break, so I highlighted the awkwardness and used the fade out button to help tone the transition down a little.

Now my song was complete. I went to file, and chose Save As and made sure to put "First Dance" in front of the file name so I knew which song was the cut one.

This is what the original song sounded like:

This is what I came up with*:

I think it sounds really natural and none of our guests will even know I did a little home doctoring to shorten the length (although I might cut it down even more since I think it is still really long). Did you attempt to cut your own first dance song?

Please leave any questions or concerns you might have in the comments, I would love to try to walk you through any problems you might be having.

*All photos for the music video I created were found here.

The "After" Shoot

It took a few months of finagling, but I was finally able to nail down a "week-after" photo-shoot with Mamacado for the Thursday after the wedding. I wasn't sure it if could happen since she has the huge task of assembling our hometown reception 2 days later. I won't be there to help them set up and tear down this event for 150-200 people, so I know that she will be insanely busy trying to get everything coordinated. It's a huge thing I am asking her to do, but we don't have much time for couple portraits on the wedding day so this is the best way to fit them in, and there is also something to be said about having wedding portraits taken by your own Mom hanging up in your house.

We won't even have to leave the honeymoon site, as we plan on having them taken at Cave B Inn. I'm sure we will spend a few minutes holding hands, wandering through the (frost covered) vineyards. Ironic that we don't drink wine, isn't it?

I've always been a fan of photos that juxtapose things, (as Mrs. Toucan showed us) and I am so in love with the idea of these sweeping grand photos with a bride and groom poised right in the middle of them. A fisheye lens could do some pretty amazing things with the Columbia River Gorge in the background.

I'll be wearing tennis shoes underneath my dress so we can hike down to these patches of green along the prairie down below. I would love to even make it all the way down to the water, as there is an old stove, a burned out car, etc sitting down there, but it's quite a hike and I am going to be wearing my dress for the reception 2 nights later.....

Who else is doing an "after" shoot? Where are you having yours done?

How Can I Thank Them?

There are no words to describe your parents when they are paying for your wedding. They are more than gracious. They blew by generous about $5,000 ago. How can you ever thank someone for such a contribution?

Yeah this doesn't work.....
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Let's try this one:

"Here is a $3 thank-you card. Thanks for paying for my wedding instead of buying a new car for mom this year, even if it is falling apart from that time I wrecked it a few years ago."

Two nights ago I sat in the kitchen and just talked to my dad. I realized I hadn't talked to him in ages about anything not related to wedding stuff. He told me funny stories about his business, and we talked about how his crops are doing. I realized that I can still be a person/daughter/girlfriend while I am in the middle of being a bride (are you really only a bride on your wedding day? I feel like I am a bride right now), and it reminded me that I need to take time to show my gratitude.

This week I took them to dinner, and had the waiter deliver a thank you note instead of the bill. It was a drop in the bucket compared to what they are spending on me, as the bill for the meal for the three of us was actually the same amount that my wedding bouquet is costing (flowers are ridiculous). It put things in perspective, and it gave the three of us the chance to talk.

I guess I should start working on those grandchildren for them. I think once they hold that first little baby in their arms all debts will be paid.

And just to note, they don't make me feel guilty for what they are doing. This is an irrational case of self-inflicted guilt I am harboring, and I am harboring suspicions that I am not alone in this.

How did you show your gratitude for those who made substantial financial contributions to your wedding?

The Imperfect Inserts

Miss Avocado and her slick haired salesman friend are back to walk you through the confusing details of her invitation inserts. If you didn't know, Miss Avo will have a temple ceremony with 35 people in attendance, a ring ceremony and dinner in Seattle for 120 people, and a tented reception for 200 (200 could come, it is TBD the number that will) at the home of a family friend.

Salesman: "Those invited to Seattle received a small invitation card insert, inviting them to the ring ceremony and dinner to follow. The curly decorative motif from the announcement was copy and pasted here as well to tie the inserts to the booklet."

Miss Avo: "Leaving these cards out of every invitation was incredibly difficult. I truly wish we had a venue large enough to seat everyone."

Salesman: "Another piece that was only sent out in 75 of the invitations to the Seattle guests, this map was a collaborative design between Mamacado and Miss Avocado. It is a Mapquest map live traced using Adobe Illustrator. The road numbers, directions, temple, heart, and Elliot Bay were all added in using Photoshop. This was provided to help guests understand the need for transportation between the temple and the ring ceremony location.

The last two elements are the only invitation elements not cut or ripped by hand from full sized sheets of paper.

Not one, but six different RSVP postcards were created. Three different fronts were designed for two different backs. Each photo below is one Miss Avocado took during her visit to Poland, which she then texturized to give a "vintage" feel. A post on how to texturize photos for this same effect will be up this week.

The photos below are of a Polish circlet (a term the bride came up with to describe a wreath hung above doorways, seen in an outdoor museum they visited), a 19th century Polish chapel steeple, and a real Polish castle she visited.All of these postcards have a delicious linen texture, ordered through Mamacado's professional photo printing lab.

One of the two backs included the following text. The swirly motif comes through again, and the wedding website for the Seattle event is included at the bottom. The tropical fruit stamps did NOT match the vintage theme, but beyond hunting down other options on ebay, this was the only choice.

The RSVP postcard sent to hometown reception guests included a few less details, but the wonderful option of sending a personal message to the bride and groom. If only it asked for names as well, such nice messages are being sent, but they are all anonymous!

Every invitation included an engagement photo, and with individual invitations so different from each other already, why should only one type of photo be sent? The pocketfolds were stuffed with one of 14 different prints, none of which would satisfy your grandma as they are all atypical announcement photos with either one or both subjects faces obscured or featuring silhouettes.

The metallic printed, linen textured photos are actually the single most expensive piece of the invitation, coming in at just over $1 each. This was completely unintentional, and should teach all of you a good lesson. If you are getting a good deal on professional products, make sure the professional does the ordering. This is a mistake that cost 70 cents 275 times over.

Not pictured are the complimentary valet parking slips (for bridal party members and grandparents) and handwritten temple ceremony invitations. Both were last minute additions, and not very attractive in their design. Despite their appearance, they did the job they were intended to do."

Miss Avo: "Thanks to my slick haired salesman friend for walking all of you through my invitations, as I am a little bit shy about presenting such an imperfect product so dear to my heart. Criticism can be directed towards him at slicksalesman@ifyoucantsayanythingnicedontsayanythingatall.com.
Feel free to direct all compliments my way :)

A big thanks needs to go to Mamacado and Elizabeth Anne Designs for the amount of work they contributed towards this project. Although I do not believe Mamacado is interested in any further invitation projects (until Sistacado gets engaged that is), EAD were a pleasure to work with, and I am happy to call them my friends after this experience.

Accept the Imperfection

Scene: A slick haired salesman in crocodile shoes approaches the readers computer screen. Miss Avocado lags behind a bit out of shyness and apprehension surrounding the critical response.

*knock knock*

A seasoned weddingbee reader, one who has seen gorgeous DIY invites come from the likes of Miss Shortcake, Mrs. Cupcake, and Miss Pomegranate comes to the computer screen.

Reader: "Hello?"

Salesman: "Special delivery, brought to you by Miss Avocado, Mamacado, and Elizabeth Anne Designs!"

Reader: "Oh, do come in. Miss Avocado teased me with a preview over a week ago, and I knew this day would be coming rather soon. I can't wait to have you show and tell me everything!"

Salesman: "Now before we begin, you should know that the Elizabeth Anne inspired prototype design was nearly perfect, but the overly ambitious Avocado realized halfway through that the only way to survive the experience was to accept that she was no DIY Diva. These invites stand as the classic example of a work produced through love, sweat, and tears and the only way to finish 275 of them was to accept the fact that she was NOT a design professional. The only way to make it was to accept the imperfection"

Miss Avo:"When I contacted Elizabeth Anne Designs (hereafter reffered to as EAD), about being my invitation design consultants I knew that I would be provided with many beautiful ideas and lots of wonderful inspiration but I realize now I overestimated my ability to execute the wonderful design. I wanted a button, a book, a map, and a binding and against all odds I made it all happen. I emailed back and forth many many times with EAD, until each piece of the invitation had a design. I (and my mom!) then took each of those pieces and tweaked them just a little bit using Photoshop and Illustrator to create exactly the look I was going for. The resulting design is a creation that could never be accredited to one, and would never have been possible without the help of all.

I'll let my friend, the slick haired salesman, take it from here."

Salesman: "I'm going to be showing the components of two different types of invitations, one for those invited to the wedding in Seattle, and one for those invited to the hometown reception in Royal City. Both have the same base booklet, just slightly different inserts. Depending on the time that the invitation was mailed a guest could have received one of three types of calligraphy, or, saldy, a clear label affixed to their envelope. These different forms of addressing guests are in no way to be viewed as a form of favoritism, and it should be noted that all of the method switching was due to the brides absolute inability to write beautifully (or legibly).

Each invitee opened their envelope to find a button wrap, and the wedding quote. The quote was hand written by Laura Hooper, scanned in, and sent to Miss Avocado as a file that could be used and reused throughout the wedding. Credit goes to EAD for suggesting having the quote handwritten and scanned.""

Miss Avo: "Each of the following booklet pages started out as an 8.5X11 sized sheet of paper, and each was cut down individually to A7 size using Mamacado's fabulous new paper cutter."

Salesman: "Miss Avocado will be doing a post on how these paper bands were individually ripped and glued by hand. Boxes of buttons were ordered off of ebay, and the all sorts of cream/gold/bronze buttons were set aside for glueing on the invitations. The post office charged 20 extra cents for non-machinable envelopes due to these buttons, bumping the cost of mailing them from 59 to 79 cents.

The three sheets of the booklet were sewn together on a home sewing machine. Once the settings were configured, it was actually quite easy to sew the three pages of different texture and thickness together.

The first page features an abstract, textured map of Europe with Poland slightly darkened and shadowed printed on vellum. Mamacado created this map by taking a basic map of Poland and layering textures and the phrase "Are we not like two volumes of the same book" in many different fonts across it.

Turn the page to find the names of the bride and groom above the phrase "For time and all eternity". This rose compass from istockphoto was just the right touch to add to the slight vintage travel theme."

Miss Avo: "The compass is a complete compass, I just had to remove That Groom's name for privacy's sake :)"

Salesman: "The middle of the book contains the actual announcement, and the full names of both the bride and groom and their parents. Polish names include a lot of consonants, and many guests have asked how they are pronounced. Miss Avocado is still practicing her new last name out loud several times a day. The swirly embelishments were designed by EAD, and really helped to tie several of the invitation pieces together.

It is no problem for us to announce the marriage to hundreds of people when only 35 are invited, as most people we know are familiar with the fact that a temple reccomend is necessary to enter into the temple. Those guests who are reccomend holders know that a personal invitation from the bride and groom will be forthcoming if they are invited to witness the event.

On the next page guests will find information regarding the time, date, and location of the hometown reception. The wording "tented reception" was chosen very carefully, as it was important for guest to realize that this was being held outside in the middle of October, and although the tent will be heated, it is important that they dress appropriately.

The last page revealed another textured map, this one of the western United States with Washington state slightly darkened and shadowed. It's a subtle theme, but a wonderful nod towards the fact that these two cultures and families are coming together to experience this once in a lifetime event.

The back cover features a handmade pocketfold (yes, 275 pocketfolds were cut out, scored, folded, and glued by hand). This is where the two invitations diverged in design."

Salesman: "Check back soon for the inserts!"

The Wedding Bands: D-U-N, Done

I have been getting a lot of things in the mail lately, but the box containing our wedding bands was one of my favorite deliveries. Christen exceeded my expectations with her detailed craftsmanship, and I can only hope that the groom will end up wearing his as he didn't give any input in the design or ordering of the bands (he doesn't really want to wear one, but I told him he has to try).

I love the fine grain texture even more than I anticipated I would, and I think it is going to be just the width he was looking for. He didn't really give me any input at all, so it's going to end up being a surprise to him on the wedding day.

I ordered three stacking rings with a hammered texture and each of the rings is inscribed inside of the band. The outer rings are inscribed with our names, and the inside is inscribed with the quote that has morphed into the central theme of our wedding.

"Are we not like two volumes of the same book?"

When I wear all three rings together, our names act as bookends to the quote. I love this little, private detail that the casual observer will never know about.

Our rings cost a total of $105 with shipping. Yes, they are not made of the sturdiest metal money can buy, and yes they will tarnish with age, but I ordered them fully aware of both of those facts (the tarnishing I am actually kind of excited about). It meant more to me to stay under budget and find something personalized and unique for us as a couple. I don't plan on wearing my wedding bands all the time, unless I am in Poland, since wedding bands are worn on the right ring finger there and I really just wanted them for that reason. Also because I wanted to have actual rings to give to each other at our ring exchange ceremony :)

What small detail about your engagment ring/wedding band makes you smile whenever you see it?

I previously posted about the soldering and engraving, check out the whole process, as it is quite cool to see how they developed!

Focus on the Marriage

Every morning I wake up almost overwhelmed with the amount of work that goes into planning a wedding weekend and hometown reception. I get as much done as I can, and then attempt to shut my mind off at night so I can fall asleep. So many other things keep getting pushed off to the side, and I end up making a lot of excuses for the non-wedding areas I keep falling short in. I don't wash my face before I go to bed, my room is a mess of wedding supplies and packages, I haven't started packing for a cross-country move I am making in 3 weeks (I don't have that much to take, but still) and somehow I still haven't applied for that perfect job opportunity that a friend emailed me about a few weeks ago. Sometimes Mr. Avocado and I only end up speaking for 10-15 minutes a day because I can't think of anything to talk about other than wedding stuff and we just get stressed out.

All of this craziness has led me to develop a mantra that I try to repeat multiple times a day:

Don't focus so much on the wedding that you forget about the marriage.

For me, the marriage stands for everything that will happen after the ceremony, Hotel 1000 festivities, honeymoon, and hometown reception. It's back to life, back to reality, back to the good stuff.

However, that doesn't mean that I can put all of the other stuff on hold until that time comes. I need to focus on my health, my spirituality, and my relationships right now, because those things are so much more important than a pretty cake or a violinist at the ring ceremony will ever be. I want the wedding to be an event that takes place in the life I am already living to the fullest, not the culmination of what I once was, or the brink of what I am about to become. Sometimes I need to remember to just breathe.

Drew Barrymore taught me to "Just breathe" in one of my favorite movie scenes of all time.

Movie Night Bridal Shower

I think most brides will agree that bridal showers are kind of overwhelming. So many people gathering around you, absolutely drenching you with love and care, and no groom in sight to help you take it all in. This was absolutely the experience I was able to savor this week, and I hope each of you are able to enjoy the same.

Upon entry, I was immediately crowned with a very fuzzy (and very small) pink princess crown. It was hurting my head a little bit, but there was no way I was going to be taking it off anytime soon. There just aren't enough opportunities to wear princess crowns in everyday life.

I was so excited to see my 6th grade teacher show up at the festivities! As you can tell, she is REALLY tall. She used to play basketball in the men's league with my dad, since she was so awesome the women didn't want to compete against her :) You can also see the fabulous trifles that we available for consumption. A fruit filled vanilla angelcake one, a chocolate brownie one, and a strawberry lemon angelcake flavored.

As you can see I filled my plate up to the brim and made sure to sample all three trifles several times to make sure they were good. I plan on eating as much as I please at the wedding as well. This bride for sure isn't on any kind of "wedding diet".

After everyone had enjoyed a little trifle treat, we all sat down in a circle. I turned to each person and spoke of a memory I had of them and why they meant something to me. My mom had suggested the idea of doing this, and it made me really nervous because I wasn't sure who was coming and I didn't know what I would say. There were a few people that I feel like I stumbled over a little bit, but for remarks made up right then and there I think it turned out to be just what we wanted it to be. It's not something you could do with just any group of people, but I lived in the same tiny town my entire life, and so most of those present were people I had known since I was in diapers.

I had two fabulous helpers when it came time for the present opening portion (the one on the left is one of my junior bridesmaids). Their excitement and enthusiasm for the presents was actually quite welcome, since I think it relieved some of the awkwardness that comes from opening gifts in front of a crowd. I know it probably wasn't as fun for the ladies to give me gift cards but I'm really excited to start shopping!

I was so in love with the popcorn and candy display that was set up for the guests to much on during the movie. My hostess went to the movie theatre and asked if she could buy some of the kiddie boxes that they sell popcorn and drinks in! It was such a cute touch, and I assured her that all of the readers would love her commitment to detail.

We enjoyed about 1/3 of "My Big Fat Greek Wedding". Everyone was really excited about watching it, but once it started we all just wanted to talk and laugh and the movie got shut off so I could talk about Poland and the wedding.

Everyone had filtered out by about 10:00 pm since it was a Thursday night and they all had work the next day. I can't thank my hostesses enough for such a fabulous bridal shower!

Now it's time to get started on those Thank You notes.....

When you receive a gift card, do you write the Thank You note after you have used it up, or do you talk about how you plan on using it in the future?